Redmum column December 22

THE Christmas festivities delayed the posting of the column until now. It's the first all-new column and not cogged together from something else. So here you go!



All I want for Christmas is...

If any of you are looking for something interesting, useful and a must-have for mummies and daddies this Christmas, look no further than a ‘Mosquito’ or failing that high frequency welding equipment.

There is nothing unusual in that when you know that Howard Stapelton (39) from Wales discovered when he was 12 that he could not bear the noise in his father’s factory where workers were using, yes you guessed it, high-frequency welding equipment.

Since that visit as a child Howard has cunningly come up with the ‘Mosquito’ which emits high pitched frequency sounds that children can hear but adults can. And children do not like it.

In fact it can be heard by most people younger than 20 and almost no one older than 30. On the whole I can live with that. I have younger friends but sorry pals I’d sacrifice ye all for some peace and calm.

He’s been testing it out at the entrance to a Spar shop in a small village in Wales. The owner of the shop was going to install a sound system to blast teenagers away with classical music until he discovered the ‘Mosquito’.

Well why culture the kids away with Bach when a high-pitched ear-piercing sound will send them away in pain?!?

The owner said that after installing the high-pitch sound emitter teenagers would come into the shop with their fingers in their ears begging him to turn off the sound but he explained to them that he had to keep it on to ward off birds in case of bird flu. Ha and they fell for it or maybe it was just that the pain in their head was so bad…

All this information was contained in an article which has appeared in The Grocer, a British magazine as well as the New York Times no less.

While I have to admit that they all sound like killjoys, we all know that teenagers hang about in packs and while it can be intimidating for some, not all young people are up to mischief.

Mr Gough doesn’t think so, he said: “It’s difficult to shoplift when you have your fingers in your ears.”

MMmhh quite, okay so both the shop owner and the inventor sound like two big killjoys, I hung about like that myself at that age but the worst thing we did was buy Mars bars for everybody.

While some are up to mischief not all of them are. And even I think they sound like a big pile of killjoy.

How and ever there are many, many occasions where the ‘Mosquito’ could be useful.

What about the top deck of the 77? Wouldn’t that be nice? Or what about those with older teenagers putting one of these devices around your drinks cabinet, okay how many people have a drinks cabinet but it could work around the cupboard or the bottom of the fridge where you keep your six-pack.

And I am sure the ones who put the railings around the Central Bank in town would love to get their hands on this machine if it works.

I’d be content with one that spreads a no-go-zone area around my make-up bag. Did you hear me Santa?

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